EP009 - Seeking asylum in the UK as a human rights activist (with Adam)

Adam wasn't his real name, but it is now. He had to create a new life in the UK after fleeing his birth country in fear of his life. 

Adam started his Adventure Solos journey with a day hike (it was so fulfilling to see him light up now he has a second chance at life) and has since joined us for the Dearne Valley Weekend amongst other events.

Hearing this incredible and bold story will give you a newfound appreciation for life and those freedoms we take for granted on a day-to-day basis.
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Adam joined us for the Dearne Valley Weekend
https://www.AdventureSolos.com/dearne-valley-weekend

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Transcript

Adam: [00:00:00] I only did this after my parents passed away. I waited many years for the sake of my mom, she was, she was everything. So yeah, I didn't want to break her heart. I kept it quiet for so many years. [I was] fighting the dark and, staying low, just, trying everything I could not to draw attention, until after they passed away.

Then I start to speak up, more loudly. No matter how [what], security measures we took. They still got to some people we know. And unfortunately, they classified these people as terrorists, [00:01:00] when all they did and said was like, we want freedom, we want a better life, we want, rights. But yeah, it is what it is.

Why did I leave? Because a big group of ours got hacked into, so they get to so many, male and female members, through that spyware they got. And yeah, they got to them and they, they got locked up. Some we don't know anything about to date.

And yeah, for me, I thought if I stay any longer, I will just end up in jail if I'm still alive. 

Nat: Hello, it's Nat here, your cohost at Life Changes with Adventure Solos. Adventure Solos help people in their thirties, forties [00:02:00] and fifties rediscover themselves and meet new people. This episode of Adventure Solos, Chris and I speak to a truly inspiring man who escaped Saudi Arabia and sought asylum in the UK.

Adam, as he's now known, stood up for women's rights in his homeland. Adam took part in online activism before leaving his family and everything he owns behind, risking it all to start a new life of freedom. Listen to a truly unique conversation of bravery and feel the sheer joy of liberation. Adam is a real character, so stay with us as we explore his remarkable story from persecution through to speed dating.

If you'd like to learn more about Adventure Solo's events, Please visit AdventureSolos.com and enter your details to sign up to the mailing list.

Chris: First off, how are you?

Adam: I'm good. I'm good. Thank you. You know, first and foremost, it's been really good to see you [00:03:00] again, Chris. And really a pleasure to meet you, Nathan. It's really an honour, you know, to see you. 

Chris: Yeah, well, for coming to share your story. I guess just had a little bit of context. So we met back in, must be about July, was it, in the summer on the Mantor hike?

Adam: It was summer, yeah. It was great, great, great day. I 

Chris: guess what, well, the context of this is when we were on that walk, we had a little bit of a chat and you've been through an asylum process and saw asylum in the UK. And that's something I know, I was going to say next to nothing, but yeah, nothing about really.

So I guess it will hand over to you a little bit and sort of be guided by your story, but really. Yeah, it's interesting. It'll be interesting to hear that. And if we could maybe just kick off with the basics of who are you, how old are you, where do you live, you know, tell us a bit 

Adam: about yourself. My name is Adam and this is my new name, you know, for my [00:04:00] new life.

I don't want, you know, I would like to, you know, disclose my, you know, birth name. But yeah, I'm 44 years old. January and next January will be 45. I came to the UK in November 2019. I used to be a human rights activist back home. It's all started with the woman rights, you know, for years. I've been like, you know, uh, Sounding my voice, you know, speaking up for a woman, a woman's rights.

And then it evolved to, you know, being in groups on social media, you know, encouraging people to speak up, to demand their rights, their human rights, their freedom of opinion, simple things just to have a decent life, to have, you know, simple rights. 

Chris: I didn't know that. And that's, that, I guess, makes sense of some of the story as well.

But it's an incredible thing that. Yeah, I wouldn't want to just gloss over. So how did you, how did that happen? How [00:05:00] did you get involved in that or, or yeah, 

Adam: where did that come from? Well, as I, as I said, it started with the women's rights. They were not allowed to work, uh, in certain places. It's only for them, you know, schools and, uh, schools.

It's either female, male or female. There is no like, you know, mix. Uh, and yeah, they get to work as female, you know, teachers, uh, they cannot, you know, work with men, uh, in, uh, any, any, any place they, they were not allowed to drive. They were not allowed or they still not allowed to. You know, say their mind, especially in within their families.

They cannot refuse to marry someone if they don't want to. They cannot be in a relationship, you know, to get to know the other person they will spend the rest of their lives with. They got no right to say no to anything. Uh, they have a male guardian 24 [00:06:00] 7 for the rest of their lives, no matter how old adult or young.

Uh, they have no, uh, opinion or, uh, say in anything, uh, regarding their own life. Uh, they have to seek, you know, uh, approved. From a male guardian, uh, wherever, uh, and whatever they want to do, they cannot travel. They cannot, uh, go anywhere outside the house without a male, you know, companion or approval at least.

And unfortunately, unfortunately, the government, you know, back, you know, these traditions and rules and they didn't, you know, like give the woman, you know, their right to have their own lives or freedom in some, like some sort of. 

Chris: I'm sure people might be able to guess, but can you say which country this was?

Adam: From Saudi Arabia, and everyone knows how it was. And I insist it was because now it has changed [00:07:00] for, you know, much, much better, but still people, you know, don't have their, you know, all their rights, but it's better now. But for me, I cannot go back. You can say I'm blacklisted, but it's, it's not the exact way, but it is because.

I don't agree with so many rules about, you know, freedom. We have, we have limited freedom. We cannot criticize, you know, the government or the regime or whatsoever. We cannot like, like, you know, for me, I don't want to, to be called Saudi because it relates to the Royal family. It's not, it's not a country.

It's, it's a family. That owns the country that owns people. So, yeah, this is the main principle. Other things, they got improved, you know. They allowed women to drive. They allowed them to travel without a male guardian. They allowed them, uh, after we spoke up. After, you know, many, uh, revolutions happened.

After, you know, many [00:08:00] people suffered. And many horrible stories, you know, uh, woman, uh, you know, died and got, you know, murdered in name of honor crimes, uh, which doesn't make any sense, you know, whenever, you know, the male feel like it or done something wrong, he will just, you know, claim it's an honor crime and, and she, the poor thing get to get the blame for it.

So yeah, it started with that one and then escalated to, you know, freedom of speech, you know, freedom of religion, freedom of beliefs, you know, we are not allowed to talk about other religions, but now it's getting more. lenient, you know, towards like globalization and, uh, inviting the world to, you know, come to Saudi and see how it's that new improved Saudi.

So yeah, now it's much, much better, but still people cannot afford. You know, to buy houses, cannot, you know, like they have to pay [00:09:00] for everything, health and education and taxes now has been implemented for years now. So, yeah, it's about being fair. It's about, you know, giving people their simplest rights to live a decent life.

Nat: And these are the Personal status laws that came in, in 2022, is that right? Where they've kind of basically codified some of the old principles. If I've got any of this wrong, then of course, please correct me. But my understanding is a lot of these rules come from a interpretation of. Islam that have then been kind of codified and put into place.

But then, as you say, this PSL rules that have come in, in 2022, have tried to move things. Forward and become more modern. Is that right? 

Adam: Exactly. Yeah, the the [00:10:00] most stupid thing is that Even the religion itself. It's it's being implemented, you know used to be taking control of Certain people as you know, the scholars are like highest men of religion and they get to say what to Do or what to say or what to not to do or not to say but now You know, the government or the royal family took over and try to be more in the middle like, you know, be more open minded to the to the world to show people how you know, this is not Islam is not the right religion because it was all on based on interpretation, you know, personal interpretation of the religion.

Instructions, you know, itself, when it's not this way, you know, the Holy Quran, you know, God himself, it's all about living in harmony with others, with everyone else, [00:11:00] not like, you know, force, you know, implement your force and be dominant and take over the whole world and you are the only one right and everyone, everything is 

Chris: wrong.

Just taking a step back maybe. So you were involved in human rights and yeah, you described how that started with women's rights and then expanded. So is this a full time kind of job that you're doing? Or is this like a passion on the side of a career? 

Adam: Well, it was a passion. And when I came 40, I realized.

That this is not the life I want, not for me, not for my future family and not for my loved ones, uh, for my siblings, for everyone I know, uh, and for people, for the community, for Saudis, for, you know, everyone else. I wanted, you know, a better life that we can all get together, no matter what, uh, you know, where you're from, who you are, what you believe in.

It's it's personal [00:12:00] things. You know, we don't have to step in and, you know, like be in charge of people's minds and beliefs and opinions and take that away from them. We have to accept each other and, you know, live in harmony with each other. So and also. To, to have a decent life. It's, it's the main thing that was, that, you know, I have my freedom of choice, uh, and I can demand my rights.

I can live a better life. I can afford to, you know, live a better life, uh, have, uh, you know, uh, better wages have, you know, better, uh, income better, like support and help from, uh, the government, and also communication with the government as well. So I shouldn't be afraid. You know, for my life to just ask for a simple thing, you know, help or, or, you know, some of my 

Chris: rights.

Did you say turning 40 that that was, uh, almost a catalyst or is that, yes, I guess I'm just [00:13:00] interested, where did the human rights thing come from as in, in your life and how did it, how much, how much time were you spending on that? 

Adam: It came, you know, it, it, uh, surfaced after, you know, some incidents, uh, of girls, you know, getting murdered by their families.

And unfortunately it gets like, you know, uh, look over, they, they, they just, you know, ignore it or, you know, uh, look the other way because it's a family business. It's, you know, family issue. They don't get involved, unfortunately. And unfortunately they blame. Religion on that one, and they says, No, it's, uh, it's Islam or but now, you know, just for the record, everything has changed.

Now, you know, a woman can go to authorities and seek, you know, help. They have, like, you know, immunity now, and they can, you know, have an independent life, live, you know, by their their self. But it wouldn't happen If we didn't speak up, if we didn't, you know, like, you [00:14:00] know, challenge the whole thing. But yeah, it started from there and then kept realizing life is getting harder.

There is so much corruption. That time when the crown prince came, he did. his best to fight corruption, but also, you know, people were not getting anything out of it. You know, it was like millions and billions taken back from fighting corruption, but nothing was like, you know, given to the people for the community, for the infrastructure, for the country.

Then the whole spending thing towards entertainment, towards like, you know, businesses, corporates, and making, you know, the country more visitable when you, you know, it should be, you know, focused on its people at first, you know, to make things right and fix everything that's been wrong for decades. [00:15:00] Then you, yeah, you look, you know, out, you know, of the box and, you know, try to improve.

But yeah, the main focus was on the economy to get more income to the country. And this is by, you know, just encouraging, you know, the tourism and make the country like, you know, tourist friendly. 

Chris: Yeah, and I do see bits of that. I think the boxer Tyson Fury lives just down the road, and I think a few weeks ago he was fighting in Saudi.

I could be wrong, but I think it was there, but I like the Dakar rally, and that used to be in Europe, and then because of terrorist threats, brought Europe to Africa, and then that got moved to South America, but they do stuff. So yeah, definitely, I think we all do see that, as you say, they're bringing in sort of the corporate stuff and trying to make it a bit more touristy.

Um, 

Nat: so I was going to say one of the biggest thing I'm really into my golf, big fan of golf and, um, Saudis have just backed this what's called live [00:16:00] golf, which is effectively a huge challenge to the American PGA tour. And they've invested billions of dollars in that. Some people call it sports washing, don't they?

Where they're effectively using. to, you know, sometimes cover up human rights, um, issues, let's say. So, you know, there's been a huge debate actually in the public sphere, especially around this, these golf leagues, and probably quite a lot of hypocrisy, to be honest as well, and sort of, um, some, some players saying, well, why you're just going there for the money?

And other players saying, well, yeah, I am, but you're, you're just doing it. You're just doing what you're doing for the money because it's a job at the end of the day. So yeah, some quite, quite interesting debates going on. 

Adam: No matter what changes been happening so far, still people are in jail for speaking up, for saying their mind, for, you know, uh, saying their [00:17:00] opinions, for asking for reforms, for like, you know, uh, suggesting, uh, you know, uh, changes.

Even, you know, so many qualified minds locked up in jail and not used for the, you know, the good for the country, unfortunately, just because they disagree with the, with the government. So this is really sad. This is really sad. And some, some, some died as well, died, unfortunately. 

Nat: So it's something I think we probably take for granted our freedom a little bit in the, the UK.

And so I think it's important for us to recognize the rights that we have here and that that's. It is genuinely great. In terms of hearing more about your story, though, I thought that from my reading that human rights organizations were effectively banned in Saudi. So I'm interested to hear how did your act, what sort of form did your activism take?

Was it kind of organized or was it just with people that you [00:18:00] knew in your town or village or wherever you lived? 

Adam: Yeah, well, I wouldn't say banned, but whoever in charge, they got their way with the, you know, the human, you know, rights organizations or whatsoever. They cannot be in public like, you know, and no one would say that, no, we are banned from, you know, talking or going into Saudi or, but they get, you know, the polished image.

You know, like this is how it looks when it's not the truth. But yeah, for me, you know, all activists back there were like on social media under like, you know, anonymous or like, you know, uh, not fake account, but like, you know, fake names or like, you know, pen name or whatsoever, they don't write, they don't write or speak in their real names or ideas, but whoever.

Came out, uh, with their [00:19:00] real Id got locked up. Why did I leave? Uh, because a big group of ours, uh, got hacked into, unfortunately, and they get to so many, uh, male and female, uh, members, you know, through that, uh, spy where they got, uh, Israeli spy spyware, unfortunately. And yeah, they got to them and they, they got locked up.

Some we don't know anything about until date and yeah, for me, I thought if I stay any longer, I will just end up in jail if I'm still alive. So yeah, and also it's all escalated after Khashoggi's murder in Turkey and the Saudi embassy as well. And we all saw how it was like misleading and everyone was part of it, you know, governments, you know, countries, not, not only the Saudi.

The government or the country itself, but [00:20:00] unfortunately money talks, unfortunately, it's, it's all about, you know, money. So no matter, you know, human life doesn't matter if it comes to money power. So, yeah, that's why I, I 

Nat: left the thing is just. Geopolitics, isn't it? It seems to be that, so, morals sort of seem to go a little bit out of the way side when geopolitics gets involved.

Um, yeah, I've seen that in the, the current, you know, conflicts around the world. Um, So you were part of a community that effectively got shut down, and then you, and then talk us about, about what happened next then. Well, 

Adam: it was, you know, the final thing was an overnight. It was now or never, but yeah, you know, the, the last three months, you know, in 2019, I was like, this is it.

I cannot, you know, do this anymore. Nothing is going to change and unfortunately, no one [00:21:00] is willing to hear us. No one is willing to give us a chance or understand, you know, because, you know, people who were locked up, people with PhDs and masters and, you know, people who knows how to talk better than me and hundreds of us, you know, and they got locked up.

So what will happen to us? How about us? So, yeah. It wasn't really, uh, going, uh, for me, so I'm, I'm not religious. I don't want to, to be like, uh, involved in religion debates or like, you know, be forced to follow, you know, a certain religion against my will. I also politics, I don't, I don't want to do anything with politics.

I just want a simple life, you know, be a human. As I should be. So yeah, I decide that I cannot stay any longer. The way I don't agree with the whole thing. So either if I can't change anything or I'm out. [00:22:00] So yeah, for me. I didn't. Yes, I left, you know, my job. I left all my qualifications, my money, car, house, property, everything I left behind.

I left lightweight, you know, so I don't, you know, get attention. I left everything literally. And I just, you know, got the visa, you know, and within a couple of days and tickets booked and just fly away. I came to the UK very afraid for my safety. The first thing I, you know, met with at the airport when I, you know, first got into the airport, I told them I'm seeking asylum right away.

You know, I wasn't like playing games. I wouldn't like hiding anything. I'm here. I'm, I'm done. I'm not going back. So the first, uh, words I hear from, uh, the customs there, they says, welcome to the UK. Don't worry. You are safe. [00:23:00] So even now I'm getting that shows really, really, I'm trying to, uh, you know, keep it together.

So, so yeah, they, they really were so, you know, welcoming and so nice and humble and, uh, They empathize with my situation. Uh, I got, uh, a night at the airport, you know, uh, to wait for, uh, an official from the home office the next day. And yeah, next day I, they even sent me an Arabic speaker, uh, from the home office, even though I told them I don't need to, but, uh, just to say.

You are welcome, you know, just to show how, how, yeah, how, you know, their hospitality could go, you know, uh, how far it could go. So, yeah.

Nat: Tell us a bit more about the detail, Adam, of that experience, because I think that'll be really interesting. You know, the sort of, imagine just turning up, I mean, it sounds like obviously somebody's [00:24:00] been nice to you at the border, makes a big difference. But, I mean, did you know what the process was before you came and then?

Talk to us actually about what happened from the moment you sort of walked up to the desk and said you're seeking asylum. Absolutely. 

Adam: Well, I, I had, uh, you know, I did my research, I did my homework beforehand, but you know, as I said, it was very quick. I didn't have much time to like, you know, have a pixel shoes or like, no, it's, it's a matter of life or death situation.

So yeah, I got, you know, not a big list to choose from. But for me, Until now, I know for sure I chose, I have chosen the best, you know, that was the best option for me to go to, you know, to seek refugee in the UK. For me, it was the best destination. Other options, U. S. or Canada, Germany, I don't speak German.

So, yeah, for human rights [00:25:00] record. UK for me is number one for English speaking, you know, countries, I wouldn't go to, you know, other countries, you know, it's all capitalism and every, every man for himself. And, you know, I knew for sure that in US and Canada, I will not be like taken care of or like even looked after.

I will be from day one on my own. I could, I could be living in the streets, you know, not criticizing their, you know, way of doing things. But this is what I heard. I know people, you know, asylum seekers or refugees there who are living, you know, on their own since day one. So yeah, UK was the best option for me.

I got everything very quick. It was really amazing. You know, the whole process, visa process and everything was like very quick, you know, speed of light. I got my ticket. I, you know, took the plane for the whole, I think it was nine hours or 11 hours. I'm not sure the whole flight. Uh, it [00:26:00] was also transit through another Arab country.

That was the most terrifying, you know, half an hour I spent in that airport. Because, you know, still, you know, uh, look over my shoulder, you know, uh, someone will, you know, or, or the borders will just, you know, ask or, you know, just, you know, send me back or delay or something because sometimes they get, you know, uh, nosy, uh, this, uh, stuff.

Uh, but yeah, I, uh, made it to the UK. Uh, I get to the airport still shaking. Uh, I don't know what will happen. Uh, I, uh, thought of the, you know, the worst thing could happen. You know, I could just sent back. Uh, but thank God it was the other way around. I was welcomed. I was like, you know, with a big smile, with an ease and comfort, as I said, you know, they let me spend the night in the airport, in a comfort, you know, a comfortable waiting area they even brought.

You know, [00:27:00] mattresses and pillows and covers and everything and food as well and drinks. And it wasn't me. Only me. There was a couple there also. Uh, the next day I got to see a official from the home office. He was very nice, friendly, was like Family member. Really? You know, he treated me like like a friend or family.

You know, that's don't worry. You are safe. I know how it is there. I'm from this country as well. He was, you know, from one of the, you know, our neighbors, you know, kind of neighbors countries. So he knew the whole thing, the whole system. So he relates to my story and he was saying that don't worry. This is your new life.

You are not going back. Keep that in mind and just it's okay. Work on it. Just, you know, believe in that and just, you know, start from this day and forward. Forget about the past and welcome to the UK. And yeah, [00:28:00] it was very smooth. The next day, they took me to a hostel in Wakefield. I spent like 70 days. in that hostel.

It was very nice, even though it was crowded, but it was very organized. You know, people were so friendly. The staff were amazing. Uh, like, you know, really, really, I got this family and friends by, uh, atmosphere. It was safe place. Uh, the authorities, the treatment there. We were, like, really treated as guests.

It's not as strangers or, you know, outsiders or whatsoever, or even a burden or something. We felt really comfortable. All paperwork, you know, all, even we got like all free stuff, you know, even the smallest as a haircut. Not to, not to say, you know, meals and, you know, bed and like, you know, place to stay and [00:29:00] games.

Even I get to go to church, you know, to see how, how different culture like other people, you know, other different minds, backgrounds and such, everything. I loved, you know, the way that, you know, we welcomed. So, you know, to the country, the way they did, it was really, uh, showing how human can be, you know, how nice human can be.

So yeah, it went, you know, the 70 days went very quick. Lots of activities, you know, paperwork, assigning a solicitor, you know, to my case and migrant help. You know, I cannot thank them enough. They did, you know. You went, you know, extra mile for, you know, to help me and, you know, to assign a solicitor for me and to build my case.

And, you know, just, you know, keep things going forward. Then COVID happened. And thank God before the lockdown, [00:30:00] I got moved, moved to Bradford to a flat, you know, more space and more freedom. Like, you know, I can go out more and, you know, like, you know, be like, you know, just with the one or two and, you know, individuals less crowded.

And also I got financial support then. And yeah, it took, you know, the case took like until, uh, last year because of COVID, because of the waiting list, because, you know, the system, you know, the numbers are so huge. So it's, it's not on them. It's, it's on us, you know, the asylum, you know, asylum seekers. So, yeah, my case got refused at first, and I've been told, you know, this is the way it is, you know, the Home Office will not accept all cases, like, you know, most of the cases, unless it's really like, you know, war zone countries, like, you know, unlivable, you know, countries.

They just, you know, refer it to the court, so the judge will [00:31:00] have a say about it. And, yeah, it was just the waiting time. The first. Appeal at at court. The judge himself told me you are not going back. So oh my God, I went down in tears and it was really until now I get, you know, the chills of that moment.

It's really overwhelming. It's really, you know, put me to my knees, you know, to see, you know, different, you know, strangers or, you know, another country cares about me that much. Uh, when I didn't receive that back home, unfortunately, but still I'm saying, you know, Saudi is better now than before. But for me, I cannot go back.

Uh, because yes, still some changes still, you know, people in jail should Come out, you know, and be a fair trial at least, you [00:32:00] know, and public trials as well. But yeah, I got my decision in, uh, last year, August, 2022, I got leave to remain in the UK. I got assigned to, you know, universal credit job center. I started, you know, looking for jobs.

I got support to move out of the accommodation. They gave me the flat one. I went, I moved out. So yeah, I'm here now since, you know, October, uh, 2022. I got the, sorry, the, even the find a job, uh, you know, system was very easy, very smooth, very like open and very clear. It's not really, you know, uh, like, you know, uh, misleading or like difficult or hard or, you know, I have no qualifications.

I left everything back home. I have no proof of my degree. I was in medical sector for almost 20 years of [00:33:00] my life. I have qualifications. I'm a certified, you know, medical staff, but I left everything. I cannot prove it. to the world. It got expired because of no practice for three years or four years now.

But still, I got good jobs. I got at first I got a warehouse. Uh, job at Amazon. I couldn't stand it because I had a back injury. I got into customer service in insurance company. Then I had to leave for, you know, uh, other, you know, uh, you know, circumstances. I got another job, uh, as a coordinator, but then I seek, you know, a better choice, a more organized, you know, place.

And then now I'm, I'm here. I'm, uh, you know, uh, working in. Like, you know, Skipton area or, you know, Keithley and this area, it's a job I love. People are [00:34:00] so friendly. I got really, wherever I go, family vibe and friends. I'm celebrating life now. I'm celebrating every event, every celebration. I don't care what background, what religion, I'm celebrating Christmas, I'm celebrating New Year's and you can see my jumper here.

It says single all the way. Get yourself out there. Yeah, I'm still single, so yeah. Yeah, another fact about me. I've been, since I got, you know, the life I want. I started since January this year to go to all speed dating events out there and try my luck, you know, introducing myself to the ladies. Did 

Nat: you see a Chris at any of these?

Chris: No. Funny enough, I have been to some. I actually, Nat, you wouldn't have known Sharon, but I met her through Speed Dating 

Nat: Glasgow. Going back [00:35:00] to your story and, you know, actually, fantastic. Fantastic that you're here and, you know, welcome again and brilliant, brilliant story and so pleased that you, you seem to be enjoying Britain and that you received a warm welcome.

For the sakes of understanding what you went through, can you talk us about uh, talk to us about the experience of being in the, I think you called it a hostel. I mean, what were you doing? Asylum seekers are not allowed to work in the UK. There was sound like a long period of time before you were granted, I can't remember the technical expression, the leave to remain or something, is it?

Yeah, leave to remain, yeah. Your ability to work. So, What were you doing? What was, give us an idea of a typical day. Yeah, well 

Adam: it was, for me, as a personal experience, I am, I was, you know, my whole life, for the circumstances I've been through, you know, I had a bit of a tough life growing up [00:36:00] as a teenager. I had issues with my dad, may he rest in peace.

Community, the culture, the traditions, it's more, you know, male dominant and the father is like, you know, uh, should be more strict, you know, and like, you know, raises children with force with, I don't know, it's a, love concept is not, uh, much of, uh, a thing there. Unfortunately, well, that that was a long time ago.

But yeah, I grow up. Uh, I end up, you know, growing up, uh, very introvert, uh, shy and lack of personality. Uh, even though I. Rick, you know, I found out when I came to the UK that I'm a good speaker, even, even I've been called a motivational speaker. Yeah. I can believe 

Chris: it. I think that's true, Adam. I can see that.

And like you say, you just said before, like celebrating life, like for sure, that's a good message to get to [00:37:00] people. 

Adam: Thank you. Thank you so much regarding the hostel thing. For me, I was so grateful for just being like, you know, welcomed and hugged and, you know, given a second chance in life to live life.

The thing is, yes, we were not allowed to work, not allowed to rent at the hostel. We still have no source of income. But we got everything provided, you know, place to stay, bed to sleep, three meals all day long. They got, you know, like some activities in the, in the area. People from everywhere, from the church, from the community, barbers, hair salons, other businesses, you know, they all.

Like the hostel had, had this all flyers and, you know, brochures from all these businesses welcoming us and, you know, talking about events and even schedules, you know, for daily events, weekly events, celebrations, gathering, you [00:38:00] know, social gatherings as well. So, yeah, I've been, I've been to these, it was like, you know, most of the time, and it's, it's, it's all me.

I was really reluctant and very shy, you know, to. mingle and go, you know, go out and meet people at first when I first came, especially these, those 70 days, I was like, afraid. I don't know what to do. I don't want to break any rules. I don't want to, uh, um, do, you know, mistake or, you know, get involved with the others.

I was afraid to speak to. other Arabs, you know, sort of speak because you know, I cannot trust them. I don't know who's who's who and if they are really who they are or they what they claim to be. Because unfortunately, governments, you know, do do dirty, you know, uh, work to get, you know, what they want. So yeah, people got, you know, tricked into like, you [00:39:00] know, confessing or saying, you know, or, you know, like exposing, you know, some critical information about themselves and they got caught eventually.

So yeah, I wasn't, uh, that social at first, you know, uh, that those 70s, 70 days, I was more focused on, uh, my, you know, paperwork and getting, you know, like a solicitor assigned to my case. And even though I was, you know, assured so many times by the, you know, the front desk there and, you know, the help there, you know, the staff that, you know, it's all right.

Don't worry. It's all going, you know, it's working and. It will take time, but don't worry about it. But still, I was like, you know, very keen to be, you know, on it like 24, seven to know what's going on. So I wasn't more concerned about activities, but yeah, I went, as I said, I went to church. For, for like, you know, a meal, uh, you know, a hot meal [00:40:00] and a drink, and like, you know, talk to people, uh, it wasn't a religious thing at all.

No one talks about Jesus or, you know, what's your background, what's your religion. No, it's all about how do you feel, are you okay, what's your, uh, thoughts, uh, what do you want, uh, in life. I met some, you know, uh, others from other, you know, uh, religions were, you know, calling for, you know, their cause or purpose or what they believe.

But I'm not against that. I'm okay with that. You know, I can just say thank you and yeah, I'm not religious, you know, I believe in all religions. I believe in God. I believe we all, we all are equals and we all human and we, you know, all religions have the same message and the same purpose. We should be all, uh, good to each other and, you know, live in harmony and love and care about each other and do good, you know, it's, we are leaving, you know, one day and it's not for [00:41:00] forever.

So yeah, leave, you know, a good thing behind. Uh, so yeah, uh, hostel was a, a, a good experience, but, but I didn't like, uh, uh, took the most of it just because of, you know, of me, you know, that was me. But when I went out. Uh, you know, the sky was the limit. I was living my life. 

Chris: You said that the first process or the first hurdle, if you will, there was a rejection and it sounds like that's almost par for the course because you weren't coming from a war zone.

But how were you expecting that first sort of request to get denied? And how did you feel when that happened? I imagine that could be quite scary. 

Adam: Yeah, well, I didn't expect, you know, from day one, I was, you know, back of my mind. I kept thinking about, you know, I will be sent back, you know, because it's not a war zone.

It's a rich country. [00:42:00] And this is what I used to get whenever I, you know, introduce myself to people, you know, out, out there, you know, whenever I said I'm from Saudi, they said, Oh, it's a rich country. So I'm not here because I'm poor. No, I had, you know, a good job. I had money. I had the property, but I left all of that and start from scratch.

Start, you know, uh, new just for my beliefs. I didn't know anything about the process. I, all I know that I, I got my proofs, uh, but unfortunately most of it was online. And that's their point that I don't have like, uh, like, you know, materials, you know, in hand, like, you know, hard copies or something to prove my case.

And also, yeah, it's a stable country. It's not like immediate threats, you know, but The thing is, I think it was a lack of knowledge. Uh, [00:43:00] and I apologize, you know, to the home office for saying that. But this is really what I saw that they were more focused about. My, my story and if this conflict with that, uh, if, if it's not consistent with this, uh, what did I say about this woman's rights marrying four women?

I was against that. Uh, I said, I said that in my, I didn't know I said that in, on my story, but they says, well, you said this, but in your country, this and that. They were referring to outdated information and pacs, but I was. Surprised when, when I met the judge, he was up to date about every single thing.

And he knew in particular, you know, the, the crown prince, the royal family, not, not the government wise or the country regulations, no, the, the, the, the man in power really. So yeah, he [00:44:00] was like, that's no brainer. You're not going back. You know, I know even, even he said on the reasons for granting me, uh, leave to remain.

He says, if he doesn't even have any evidence, the fact he's, you know, uh, came to the UK and seek asylum, that's enough to get him, you know, you know, his life threats. And he will end up, if he goes back, he will end up in jail. So, so. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I seek asylum, you know, I came as a refugee, uh, and, and of course, you know, my visa expired that time already.

It was only six months, but yes, it took a long time, three years. Waiting for a decision, but yeah, COVID get, get the, the blame of that. Yeah. That that's on COVID. So yeah, no one to blame, but then [00:45:00] it was like, you know, uh, I do, I don't, I don't know what to say downhill or uphill, but it was downhill as smooth.

You know, just flowing. It was, it went very quick, you know, the, the court appointment and then the dec, the dec decision afterwards. It just, you know, done deal. It was, you know, no brainer. But yeah, I, I, at first when I got the rejection, I was really devastated and I thought, that's it. Uh, I'm, I'm dead. But, thank God, you know, my sister, you know, knows, you know, he was really a good man and he told me, don't worry, it's a formality, it's more like, you know, a normal thing, you know, they reject, you know, I don't want to say it, but he said 99 percent of the cases, it's just like, you know, straightforward, if it's not, you know, hard, solid proof.

You got that your life in danger and you will die if you go [00:46:00] back right away. Otherwise they will not accept right away. So they only accept from this country and this country. He even named, you know, one or two countries. So it was this. Very picky. Yeah. But then he says, don't worry, you know, hopefully you, you know, the, the, the judge you, you will meet.

He will know, you know, everything about your country and he will take your side and will support you. But, but yeah, I, I got, you know, comfort at that moment and we just waited for the appointment and then after everything went really well. 

Chris: Yeah. And I guess the thing we've not touched on too much, you know.

Again, just to disclose what you're comfortable with, but you mentioned you have to have to leave your life and that includes, you know, yeah, your, your career and your car and your property, but family as well, you, you know, as you say, you can't go back and you've had to leave family [00:47:00] behind. 

Adam: I only did this after, you know, my parents passed away.

You know, I waited many years for the sake of, you know, my mom actually, you know, she was, she was everything. So. Yeah, I didn't want to break her heart. I kept it quiet, you know, for so many years. Like, you know, fighting in the dark and staying low. Just, you know,

trying everything I could but not to draw attention until after, you know, they passed away. Then I start to speak up more loudly. I start to, you know, get more, uh brave and courageous. But then, yeah, no matter how security measures we took, they still got to some of, you know, people we know. And unfortunately, they Classified, you know, these people as terrorists, as enemy of [00:48:00] the, you know, the country, unfortunately.

When, when all they did and said was like, you know, we want freedom, we want a better life, we want, you know, rights, this and that. But yeah, it is what it is. So I only got my siblings back home and I didn't leave until the last and the youngest was married. You know, they all have their own families, kids and, you know, wives and husbands and everything because, yeah, for me, I'm a father figure.

I was like, you know, taking care of my siblings for over 20 years of my life. So, yeah, I couldn't just leave them, you know, knowing that, you know, someone is still not, you know, settled or something like this. So, yeah, I, you know, I made sure I made sure all of them were like, you know, fine. 

Nat: Are you still in touch with them, Adam?

Do you, [00:49:00] can you voice video call them and that type of thing, or is that difficult? 

Adam: Barely, barely, you know, through social media, of course, and anonymously. They don't know, they don't have my number, they don't have my contacts, they don't know where I am, they know, you know, I'm in the UK, but yeah, they know I'm alive, I'm happy, I'm safe.

And that's all they need to know. So yeah, I, you know, we just, you know, give updates, you know, just me and one of my brothers. So yeah, uh, and he is like the ambassador there. He, he gets the message to all of them. So I tried to minimize the contact as minimum as possible so they will not, you know, get harassed or, you know, chased by the government or anyone.

And I already explained that I'm no longer there. You know, as, uh, as long as, you know, it matters, you know, you just live your life. [00:50:00] Um, okay, I'm happy and this is my life now. So if we meant to see each other again, we will. 

Nat: Yeah. So you have to take, I mean, we've alluded to it. On this conversation so far, but you have to take measures to keep yourself safe and your family safe back home.

I mean, do you feel safe, obviously being on a podcast like this and putting yourself out there, you're taking presumably a certain amount of risk and do, do, does the UK government give you any direction, you know, around, around that? 

Adam: Well, not me specifically because I'm not like a public figure or someone well known like, you know, some others in London.

Yes, they got, you know, that sort of protection and awareness and also like, you know, uh, being like connected to [00:51:00] the authorities 24 seven, uh, because of real, you know, threats or like, you know, or the big influence they have. But for me, I'm just a random person. I'm just, you know, a normal guy. I'm just, you know, very, I'm, I'm no one.

But yeah, for me, I feel safe. I have nothing to fear. But I'm, I'm no longer in that sort of thing. You know, I'm, I'm just, you know, a simple guy living my life, trying to start, to start over and have, you know, a different life. I got second chance in life. So I want to make it a better one. I want to make it worth it.

I want to make my life worth living. I'm 

Nat: glad, glad to hear that. Tell us about what you think of the UK then. I mean, obviously being brought up in living here, you get a certain perspective, but really interested to hear what you [00:52:00] make of UK culture. John, tell us some of the, some of the things you were surprised by, perhaps, some of the quirky things we have in British culture.

Have you, have you been, had fish and chips? Do you, do you know what a penguin, a penguin bar is? You know, have you learned all this stuff yet? Uh, 

Adam: well, I don't know what a penguin bar is. I know penguin as, as a penguin, you know, the animal, but the, the bird, but I was, You know, I, I already had, you know, uh, some, you know, knowledge beforehand, you know, about the UK and this is why I love the UK before I get to the UK.

For me, it was first about the proper English, you know, the English I know and learned and speak, you know, have been speaking. Speaking, you know, my whole life was nothing was rubbish was like, you know, street language was like nothing compared to the [00:53:00] proper English I know in the UK. So this is why this is my number one, you know, after, you know, uh, human rights record after, you know, being safe where I will be.

So, yeah, English language, the culture of English people, you know, the. The good manners they have, the respect they have, they show, the, you know, the etiquettes, the, the way they live their lives, you know, by etiquettes, by good manners, by, you know, respect for the ladies. I'm really, you know, an old fashioned, uh, I would like to say old fashioned gentleman, but yeah, I, I, I want to experience this because back there we, we, we were like, you know, depraved.

We weren't like, you know, we [00:54:00] didn't have the chance to practice these things. It's just, you know, male dominancy and like, you know, the man of the house, wherever, you know, you go, a woman has no say in anything. They just there for taking care of the house, the children feed and cloth and like, you know, do a house, you know, chores and everything.

When the man is everything and like, you know, he's the front line, he's everything, you know, the big image and everything. So Yeah, I'm I'm I'm a loving, caring person. You know, I was in, you know, health care for 20 years of my life, taking care of people being, you know, compassionate and, you know, empathize with sad stories and people with, you know, bad situations going through bad situations in life.

So, yeah, I love taking care of people. I love putting myself in people's shoes. So, I get this [00:55:00] experience now. I get to see how people care and love, how I never experienced hugs in my whole life like I did in the UK. So yeah, I'm very thrilled, you know. 

Nat: Really? We're not, we're not even, we're not even known for hugs, I don't think.

So yeah. 

Adam: Oh my God, oh my God, wherever, wherever I go, even, even the speed dating, even, sorry I, I, I go back to this subject, but even the speed dating, wherever I go, I, I, I tell, you know, just the headlines of my story and the ladies will, wow, you are so brave. You are, I love your story and we, I want to be your friend.

So, 

Chris: yeah, we're going to have to, we're going to 

Nat: have to put a link, aren't we? But I, we're a single lady on the profile. To 

Chris: your Tinder profile. 

Adam: So, yeah, it was, it was like, you know, a different, different, really lovely [00:56:00] experience for me. I love it. 

Nat: It's just very open. It sounds like, you know, compared to the culture you used to, it's very open.

And I mean, we talked about the speed dating and perhaps that struck a chord with you just because it's just such a open environment, you just go along and meet people and, and why not? But you're not drinking, you're not drinking cups of tea and talking about the weather every morning or anything like that 

Adam: just yet.

Not yet. Not yet. Well, I've been, I've been on, uh, you know, meetup app for a year or two now, and this is my way, this is the way I started, you know, to go out, to socialize, and thank God I found that, uh, I found adventure as well as, so yeah, I started going out to these events and see how, how, how it is like, you know, uh, you know, living in the UK.

I want to know more about the culture, about, you know, how people live their lives. How they, you know, interact and engage in [00:57:00] communities. What is the proper way to do it, you know, I love, you know, good manners and I want to learn about, you know, English manners and, uh, being like, you know, a good, you know, good gentleman, you know, to for the sake of it.

So, yeah, I, uh, because it's really goes with my, with the, with the real me, you know, with my personality, I, I love, you know, uh, smiling at people, you know, uh. Talking in passion about things I love, uh, and also, uh, get involved and help and care for others. So, uh, this is why I love my job now. You know, I get to help, you know, people, even if it's a customer service thing, but still, you know, on the other end of, you know, line helping, you know, uh, people struggling when, uh, with, uh, the product they have.

Anytime through the night, you know, [00:58:00] I work night shifts and yeah, I was really shocked and amazed. You know, it was, you know, happy thoughts when I see how the community works, how people are really acknowledging, you know, accepting and really open minded about, you know, the idea of me being in their country.

And it's no, I'm not stranger. At all. I'm like, you know, random guy, you know, just living with the random people and getting to know people and everything. So this is why I insist on explaining wherever I go that yes, I'm from the Middle East. Yes, I'm from Muslim country. But I'm not religious. I believe in God.

I believe in all religions, all prophets, all you know, holy books. I don't care what you believe in, where you come from, what's your color? What's your gender? What's, you know, [00:59:00] how you pronounce, or how you identify, or whatever. As long as you respect my boundaries, I respect yours. You know, we understand each other not to cross, you know, lines and just, you know, be understanding and open mind about it and accepting.

And who am I to judge? You know, I'm not God, and it's what you believe in, uh, whatever it is. This is why I don't like to talk about football or politics or religion, because I don't understand anything in these, you know, subjects, and I don't like the idea of debating, or it's more, it's become more competitive.

Uh, then, you know, yeah, become more argumentative than, than, you know, uh, seeking the truth or the right thing or, so yeah, just let, you know, live and let live, you know, it's, we all here on this. Yeah. [01:00:00] We all hear guests in this, in this earth. So, so yeah, we are leaving one day. So just, you know, live your life and let people live theirs as well.

So this is what I really, this is what I really found in the UK. It's 

Chris: a nice way to put it, isn't it? That we're all guests on this earth. I like that. 

Adam: Absolutely. We are. Yeah, we are. Definitely. 

Nat: And what's next for you, Adam? What's the, what's the future hold? 

Adam: Well, um, you know, uh, I don't, uh, I might have a bucket list, you know, made up since I came to the UK, but yeah, for me, I'm, I'm for sure I'm trying everything.

You know, at least once, so I'm, you know, starting a new life, I'm doing everything. Um, you know, like being myself, enjoying my life, not being, you know, judgmental, being open mind, my mental health. I really, really, you know, it really opened my eyes when I came to this [01:01:00] country, how mental health is really important.

And how people take it seriously here in the UK. So yeah, I'm focusing on my mental health. This is why I'm going with adventure solos, you know, for this, you know, events, wild camping and others. And, uh, I'm living my life. I'm working on my self progress, you know, growing my self growth. So yeah, I'm, I'm not all, you know, I got the job now.

Um, you know, taking driving lessons as well to get the license. Uh, so this is the next step. I started the dancing lessons as well. So yeah, absolutely. I have to impress the ladies. So yeah, so yeah, I'm learning how to dance. I love I love dancing, but unfortunately, it was like a shame back home. You know, men, you know, should not.

Cannot dance. It's not. It's a shameful thing to do, unfortunately. [01:02:00] So yeah, I'm doing it. I'm loving it. Uh, yes, I drink occasionally, you know, just in social, you know, uh, gatherings just for the fun, you know, just to, uh, have, you know, uh, smooth conversation, you know, get maybe more smooth with the ladies and, you know, uh, but yeah, I, yeah.

Also, fun fact, I, uh, I just realized that, uh, I don't get drunk. 

Chris: Yeah. 

Adam: All the same. Yeah. The thing is, the trick is I got, when I get headaches, I don't have hangovers next day. No, I just, you know, at the moment, if I had, if I have enough, I get a headache, so I stop right away. So this is my, yeah. 

Nat: Stop the night before, so to speak.

I thought you were going to say, I had an old, I don't know, I've still learnt that. I had a friend years ago [01:03:00] who said, Nah, I don't get hangovers. I said, What do you mean? He said, No, no, I don't get hangovers, but the next day I get a bit tired. I get a headache, feel a bit dehydrated, so yeah, that's a hangover, so you do get them.

Adam: Yeah. For me, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's over, uh, that night, uh, once and for all. Yeah. Next morning I'm up fresh and even, even if I have to go to work, I'm, I'm good. It's 

Chris: incredible, isn't it? I mean, you've been through a hell of a journey and. And just so pleased for you, Pali, that hopefully some of that stress has been taken away.

I'm sure there's times when it's difficult, as you say, being removed from your family, but as you say, this is almost a second chance at life and it's finally time for you to be able to prioritize yourself. And yeah, I guess we use this line 

Adam: sometimes, but yeah. Yeah, sorry to interrupt. To be honest, this is the only thing I miss back there.

The only thing, you know, my blood, the only [01:04:00] thing, this is why I'm seeking, you know, to start, you know, hopefully start a family here in the UK one day, but baby steps, you know, I'm just getting to know, you know, the culture and. The thing I want to know more about the culture. I need someone by my side to enlighten me, to, you know, like, show me the way, like, you know, help me throughout the way.

But I'm making progress. I'm, you know, I'm making friends, uh, you know, getting connections. The idea of Being with a female companion, no matter, you know, the relationship is a friend or, you know, acquaintance or, you know, a co worker whatsoever. It's something totally new to me. You know, we didn't experience that back home.

For, you know, 40 years of my life gone, I haven't experienced so many things that I have now in just, you know, three or four years. [01:05:00] So, oh my God, that's really a huge progress for me. It's really like, you know, it's not a total transformation for me. So the idea is just, you know, amazing. Overwhelming. Oh my God, you know, I can speak to women.

I can meet and greet. I can, you know, just, you know, be. There, you know, just be normal and not being like awkward or like being, you know, weird or like, you know, pervert or, you know, called names or being like, you know, a judge, you know, uh, about this thing. No, I can just be myself. Just be respectful and be the gentleman I know I am.

And get to practice, you know, this. Must 

Nat: be hugely liberating to feel like that. 

Adam: Absolutely, 

Nat: absolutely. Must also be us thinking, you know, when you're speaking there, Adam, must have been lonely at times as though, as well, you know, you just turn up on the doorstep, you come in, and great, you know, it sounds as though the UK has welcomed you with open [01:06:00] arms, and, you know, I think, can be proud of that.

But, but, But it must have been really difficult. And were you lonely at times? 

Adam: So many times, yes. I, I, I had, you know, cried so many nights alone, you know, cried to sleep, but the good thing is that, you know, I, especially this year, and especially after, you know, when I started my last job, I start to go out more, you know, meet people more, you know, socialize more.

And amazing thing happened. People start to, you know, to reach out more to me. I went, you know, I've been more on Facebook and, you know, social media. And because I was shy before, I wasn't like, you know, I didn't care much about, you know, social media for the sake of just, you know, socialize, socializing or anything.

I only dealt with the social media back there, you [01:07:00] know, with the human rights and everything. But now, Now? No, I'm, I'm, I'm in it to win it. I'm, I'm there to, you know, meet people, to make friends, to go, you know, like just get out of my comfort zone. I already did the big part of, you know, getting outta my comfort zone of 40 years of my life.

But now this is the next one to just be, forget, you know, about being shy or what this nonsense just, you know, be out there. 

Nat: Yeah, just push yourself outside the comfort zone, right? And I think that's inspiring to other people. 

Adam: Exactly. Exactly. And, and, and yeah, I, I, I had the people reach out, you know, from, you know, ex job co worker from, uh, you know, one of the jobs reached out and we went out, you know, had, you know, very, you know, amazing night, you know, out and yeah, I'm staying connected.

Whenever, whenever I meet, you know, someone new, I just keep [01:08:00] in contact and just, you know, get out every chance I have. And now really I'm taking it. literally to the fullest. I'm living my life to the fullest. You know, whenever I have a time off from work, I'm doing something. I'm not staying home. 

Nat: Fantastic.

Great to hear. No, I think it's fantastic. And as I say, inspiring to other people, including myself, that you can get out there. And you know, I think often in life we get We get, we get stuck in a rut and we might have the same friends and friends who have other priorities in life and they don't have the time and so this will ring true for a lot of people, I think, and it's just get out there and meet.

You can always meet new people. I think often we think, oh, you know, I'm now 30, you know, my friends have got to go. Families or they've got this, or they've got not the time for me, forties, fifties, we can always make friends. We can always meet new people, have new experiences. And yes, it's great to hear that, [01:09:00] that you're, you're doing that.

And I'm sure, you know, as time goes on, you'll, you know, you'll meet some, you'll make some great friends in the UK and have lots of people around you. 

Adam: Absolutely. And just for the record, just for the record, Nathan, people here in the UK just made it very easy for me. It's, it's them, it's them, it's them, you know, they encourage me to be more social, to go out more, to like, you know, this is how life should be.

So yeah, thanks, thanks to you guys, thanks to, to UK, thanks to people here in the UK. They really made my life, they really changed my life. Chris, so that day, you know, I was just, you know, out in the nature, you know, just a normal day, you know, out doing just, you know, hiking or just walking, having a chat, having a laugh, sharing stories, whatsoever.

But for me, it was a life changing experience. 

Chris: I could see that. I could [01:10:00] see that in you. You're just so absorbed in it. And I know the landscapes and stuff are different, you know, I guess. So I grew up in the Middle East. To come back and you have rain and grass and the hills, but I could see that in you.

And it was nice to sort of see the world almost through your eyes. And I think we all did a little bit that day. 

Adam: Oh my God. Oh my God. I love this. Thank you so much. I love, I love this world. Oh my God. You made my day. The world through my eyes. Oh my God. Yes. It's, it's, it's, it's the same land, you know, everywhere, you know, it's, it's a green here, you know, uh, Sand there, sky, you know, rain, but the feeling of freedom, of liberty, of like, you know, I literally could fly, you know, the song, I was singing the song that day, I believe I can fly.

I believe I can touch the sky. This is what I was feeling that day. I, you know, literally [01:11:00] felt I'm a free man. I believe that that moment, I knew how it felt that moment that day. And with those people, you know, with you, Chris, and all these, you know, those people. Oh my God, everyone was like, so interested in me and hear my story.

And when I say, when I started, when I say I changed my name to Adam. And yeah, one thing led to another. But they were, they were all supporting all like, you know, impressed and like, you know, wow, we did this and cannot believe how, and one lady did say that. And I think you remember Chris, she says, you, you, you show us Adam, how we took things for granted.

So, oh my god, that was a shock, really, I never, I never heard that before, and, and thank you guys, you know, wherever I go, people make me feel [01:12:00] so special, when, you know, just when they hear my story, for, for me it's, it's just, it happened, so, so what? Yeah, but for them, oh no, you did all this, you are so inspiring, you are so, you know, brave, and this and that, and oh my god.

Oh my god, they, every time, they just, you know, made my life even better, you know. Even, even, even, even when, you know, if I go to singles parties or speed dating or whatsoever. Uh, I get, you know, somehow rejected, you know, like respectfully rejected or, or, you know. 

Chris: Yeah, that's life. We all have to deal with that.

Adam: Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, but, but, oh my God, you know, people are so respectful, are so nice. So humble, of course, you will, you will have, you know, some weird, you know, and it's everywhere in the whole world. You know, you will find, you know, [01:13:00] one different situation or different person, but the majority 99. 99%, you know, all people were so nice, so understanding, so kind, so humble, so loving and caring.

They showed me how is it, how it is simple. Uh, very simple, uh, to just to show love and care just to be nice, you know, that doesn't cost. 

Nat: It's great to hear you had such a nice, oh, sorry, Adam cut cross you there. No, 

Adam: no, no, I was just saying it doesn't cost anything really to be 

Nat: nice. It's great to hear that you had such a good time on the Adventure Solos day.

How did you find out about Chris and Adventure Solos? 

Adam: Well, I think it was on Meetup app at first. Yeah, I, I was, I was like, you know, happy trigger, like, you know, joining every single group around the [01:14:00] area activities. I was, because, because, yeah, I was, you know, what I loved about Meetup that you get to choose the activities you want.

Categories as categories or by, you know, areas, you know, surrounding areas or postcode or whatsoever. But yeah, through activities, you know, I want outdoors, I want, you know, hiking, I want to make friends, socialize, even dating whatsoever, interested in this and that, cycling and walking, hiking, swimming, whatsoever, dancing.

So yeah, it led me to Adventure Souls. That was the first. group. You know, I signed up for outdoor activities. And then I found, you know, Chris and adventure stores on website online. And yeah, I was sold for the, you know, the first, the first free hike. Brilliant. 

Chris: I mean, Adam, I'm so pleased for you. I'm sure it's not been easy.

As you say, it's It's funny if [01:15:00] that is, you see it as just your life and sometimes it takes other people maybe to say how inspiring it is, but it really is. I'm so pleased for you. You know, I love the fact that you say you're celebrating life and you've got this almost second chance. And I'm sure, I'm sure it's not easy, like having a start, you know, like learn to drive here and get your qualifications and your job, but, and single all the way.

But I'm glad that you're, that that's, Yeah, you've got the freedom now to do that. So I'm really pleased for you and it's, it is inspiring to 

Adam: hear your story. So much. Well, I had, I had my, you know, three years to, to cry about, you know, and bitching about, you know, being lonely, left my country, everything.

Sorry for that word. But yeah, it's all over. It's all behind me and I'm starting fresh and here I 

Nat: am. Yeah, you got a great attitude and I think you're, you're going to get a strength. You can just tell you're gonna go from strength to strength. And I do think that it's, [01:16:00] it is, I have a strong belief and positivity in the UK that you can get on and do things and meet people and make your life better.

And I don't necessarily mean that in a materialistic way either. Sure. I'm sure Materialistically you can be better off and Sure you will be. But also just in the relationships you'll be able to have and, you know, I'm sure keep going to those, those speed dating events, get the profile, get the profile link below.

And uh, yeah, I'll have to get your, your address. I'll send you some penguins. So you know what those are and thank you 

Chris: so 

Adam: much.

Chris: Hey, it's Chris here from Adventure Solos, where we help people in their thirties, forties and fifties to rediscover themselves and meet new people. If you'd like to find out more about Adventure Solos events, visit AdventureSolos.com, that's AdventureSolos.com, where you're very welcome to stay in touch by joining the mailing list.

[01:17:00] So AdventureSolos.com and enter your details to sign up to the mailing list.